i was going to write only one journal but it turned out to be so long that i am splitting it up into two journals. a second journal will be coming not too long after this one! so, like... in 3-4 days. i want this one to stay up at the top of my page for a bit and then the next one will be on my page for a longer time.
i would like to bring your attention to two very special contests!!!
, we are holding a contest that ends on sept 30th so hurry and do your entry!!!
you can win MONEY, and also art from me!! at this point it's pretty rare to get free art from me (or even paid art. i don't do commissions right now) so take advantage of this while you can. and see the other great artists from whom you can win prizes: lacesong.deviantart.com/journa…
also there is a contest being held by tiffa
about her anime series "shadow magic"!!! there's been a deadline extension so check it out. you can win money here too. forum.deviantart.com/community…
and now, here is a follow-up to the previous journal: sachi-pon.deviantart.com/journ…
i will answer the comments from there. i'm sorry because it's been so long by now. so i'm too embarrassed to actually reply to the comments THERE. instead i'll just write my responses below!!
by the way, it's funny because in that journal i was talking about a particular comment on my art that made me upset. yet, by now i can't remember who made the comment, and i don't remember what the comment said (except that i got the impression that the person didn't notice my improvement.).
i was afraid to read the comments on that journal, so i haven't read them until right now. that journal was my rebellious "i don't care" statement, and so if people criticized me for THAT, i wouldn't know what to say. i explained why i no longer care about critiques/criticism, and so i was afraid that someone would make a criticism of that journal itself, which would miss the entire point and would prove that the criticizer did not understand me at all and that my explanation failed miserably. i really didn't want that to happen, which is why i was afraid to look at the comments. i told you that i felt bad about myself. so, writing that journal wasn't easy and took a lot of courage.
naavaz said:"Its sad how there always people who will try to put others down! They just have to leave bad comments... its not even worth reading some. I agree with you, the ''I don't care attitude" is one of the best ways to react ( i think at least). You have to be strong! OwO And nice idea by the end... i think it would do wonders on bad days...
I know i am not a very active watcher but know that i love your art and if you need something, just tell me! By the way, i swear i am working on your art trade hahaha (very slowlyyyyy)"
i'm so glad you understand me. those types of comments are not worth reading because it's annoying when i was feeling great about myself and my art until i read that comment (plus some other comments too that happened later on). if those comments hadn't happened then i would still be feeling great. that's why the comments aren't worth reading. it doesn't accomplish anything for me to read something like that. it only brings me down.
omg you didn't forget our art trade!!!! XDDD surprisingly, neither did i!! it seems like i forgot about it but i didn't. i just don't have time to work on that at the moment but i still remembered it.
katiefrog217 said:"I think this is a great way to thank your watchers, even if it does seem a bit self-centered to others ^-^"
lol yeah i was trying to not make things ALL about myself so i'm doing a feature. it'll happen in the next journal. but still i am glad people listened to my self-centered talk... hahaha.
euxz said:"I have a few on paper that I need to ink then I'll link them to you. :3
Also that side-note tip is really good idea, I should do that myself.
Keep up your chin and don't let people drag you down. "
yes you should do that idea!! hopefully you will have a comment from me in there because you mean a lot to me and i've told you that
cello342 said:"I wish I was watching you before! I really like your creativity and coloring and everything. Anyways, I am now watching you! Here is the artwork I would like you to feature,
I chose this one because I spent a lot of time on it and I like the result! Thanks for your help getting my art there! Keep up your good work"
it's okay i'll still feature you. i'm glad you like my art. i appreciate you very much!!
EDIT: the thumbnail displayed when i first posted this journal but i removed it because i only want to feature next time.wondering-souls
said: (and i did notify you because your comment was long and i wanted you to see my response)"Are you referring to your latest improvement meme?"
i forgot the particular comment i was referring to in that journal. though, by now, there have been two improvement memes and some more comments made."I read over the comments and while they could have been worded more eloquently, they did touch on some important points. (Of course, there were some troll comments, but ignore those.) They were mostly constructive criticism, and those comments are common on improvement memes."
not that i've seen. i don't usually see critiques given on improvement memes. (with the exception of people who directly ask for critique in the artist comments.) usually i see comments like "nice improvement!" and things like that. the fact that i got critiqued on my improvement memes was a huge letdown for me and it has made me not want to do any more improvement memes. sometimes over the past several weeks i've thought about doing another one and then i instantly lose motivation because 'i'll just get critiqued on it just like any other picture, the fact that i improved won't be noticeable to most people.' there is currently one old illustration i am planning to redraw and i've been planning that for a long time. other than that, no. i won't do it anymore. it's pointless for me to do an improvement meme if people are going to interpret it as not meaning much and not being special.
critiquing an improvement meme is like... what if my family, when i graduated college and had my ceremony and all that, had taken that time to scold me about some of my bad grades? it's a fact that i did get some bad grades, but the point of the graduation ceremony is to celebrate my achievement. so mentioning my mistakes at that time would be bad timing and would ruin the mood of the whole event."While it can be disheartening to not hear nothing but good things, it's part of how artists grow. Those who critique you constructively (key word: constructively) are trying to help you improve as that seems like a goal of yours."
their critiques don't help me improve though. i just improve on my own. people have been critiquing me for years and it's barely done a thing. i still have this problem where many people don't notice my improvement. if critiques were so important then i wouldn't have even had this incident where several people critiqued an improvement meme. like i said, it's been happening for years. the same thing happens over and over again. people critique me, i improve, and then some people don't notice the improvement and critique me. then the cycle happens again and again. don't you see what's happening here? each time, people say to me "it's to help you improve," like they're giving me hope of improvement in the future. it's false hope. nothing ever changes. it's a cycle. yes i do improve but if there are many people who don't notice... then, okay, what's the point? it's just the same as last time! i don't have hope that they'll actually help me. and like i said, i improve on my own too.
if anyone has a question about this paragraph above, i don't mind explaining more because it was hard to explain here and maybe i didn't explain it very well.
here's another way i can say it: there are some artists who rarely get critiqued, even when they get a lot of comments,
few of them have anything negative to say. if you look at the ratio of positive comments to comments that include something negative, the ratio of positive comments is much higher than ones that have a negative thing. that's what i want and that's what i'm upset that i'm not getting. the ratio of positive-to-negative comments is what's always bothered me and for years i've hoped it would change and it never changes. that's what was so upsetting to me in the previous journal. it makes me feel like i'm running in a hamster wheel. i questioned myself "will i ever become pro?" don't get me wrong, i don't feel bad about my art. i felt good about my art but if other people don't like it, i can't become a pro. i still feel good about my art, right now! it's people's comments i don't feel good about. not the art itself."Regardless of skill level, there will always be something an artist can improve on. I'm glad that you are working to improve yourself, and perhaps you're just the kind of person who can't handle taking critiques (and there are plenty of people who can't! you're not alone there). I used to be the same, and even now, I'm shaky when it comes to it. I have to remind myself that the person is trying to be helpful and it's still my choice in the end whether or not to listen. I've found many times where I've been given critiques to be extremely helpful, they point out things I miss, or perhaps I saw something wrong but couldn't quite put my finger on it until they said something, etc. It can be frustrating at times, even discouraging, but it is for the benefit of the artist. (Again, "constructive" critiques, out-right bashing does not count as a constructive critique.)"
yeah and this is why i do want to listen to critiques from some people. i won't shut out critiques altogether. i'll listen to my closest friends and i will be sending occasional notes to specific people asking them for critique (if they have the time)
i don't want to get to the point where i ONLY rely on myself, and yet, it's so hard for me to trust others about this situation."I have noticed that a fairly good way in giving critiques is through something called the "critique sandwich." That's where the critiquer mentions what they feel could be improved sandwiched between praise in what was done successfully in the artwork. Perhaps that would be more up your alley and be more effective and beneficial for you? I've noticed that those type of critiques make things easier for me as an artist receiving them. It's important that the critiquer point out things that are working in the art, not just what isn't, that seems to be what you're aiming at here in your rant."
you're right although there are two things to point out (1) yes i definitely prefer sandwich critiques to just criticism. getting just criticism without anything positive is horrible to me. no matter how politely the comment is worded, no matter who the person is, no matter how much they are genuinely trying to help, if there are no positive things mentioned then it's such a crappy feeling like getting slapped in the face. (2) all of that refers to normal illustrations and not improvement memes. i don't want any critiques on my improvement memes, not even "sandwich" critiques. none at all. again, it's like going to someone's graduation ceremony and scolding about bad grades. still, my "no critique on improvement memes" thing is mostly irrelevant now because i will no longer do improvement memes. there's one more i'll do. but other than that, no. i'm done. even if i tell people "don't critique this" people will get mad at me for saying that so it's better for me to just stop doing them altogether."My only suggestion for you is to draw and draw as often as you can. Practice, experiment, go outside of your comfort zone. Figure studies, value studies, life drawing, things like that can help your art go a long way. I know you fear losing your style, trust me, I was in a similar boat. I didn't want to practice realism either, however I gave it a shot, and what I found out was that, while my style did grow and change and evolve, I could still go back to my old style. I can go back any time I want. My ability to draw my old style hadn't been lost, I had been drawing it for years and remembered it quite well, I found emulating it wasn't that difficult, especially since I had been practicing so many other styles. I've noticed that when I do draw my old style, it's actually better now than what it used to be, because I understand more and can apply things that I couldn't before. Granted, I've chosen not to draw my old style anymore since I've grown into wanting a different look, but that's my choice, and it's your choice too. "
that was my fear. i feared losing my style, if i did too many drawings that were way outside it. i've never seen a comment like yours, where someone said they were afraid to lose their style, then tried other things outside their style, then came back and their style was better. your comment does give me some reassurance but honestly i'm still afraid. if more people said things like what you just said, i wouldn't be afraid. but you're the only one for now.
there have been many people throughout the years who have tried to get me to learn realism in attempt to basically start over with art. they didn't tell me how i could keep my style. they were more interested in seeing me get rid of my style. so that's been my problem. i get really rebellious about this topic because it just makes me so angry to this day that all these people thought that "my style" was nothing more than an excuse, and they wanted to me to ignore its existence. and i don't want to become one of those artists who is lost, wandering around, not sure what style they want to draw in, and then their art comes out looking stiff and mechanical because they're just so confused and trying to force the art to come out of them.
so i will only do realism practice occasionally. not very much because (1) the reason i just stated above (2) my time management skills are horrible and i don't have time to do realism practices when i have a long to-do list of things to draw (in my style)"Nevertheless, best of luck to you! I do hope you can reach your goals."
thank you for taking the time to write a thoughtful comment and i'm sorry for not responding earlier.
"I guess i'll join then ^^ I wish we could talk a lot more now but I guess i'm pretty busy recently... but here is my new piece! rave-kunn.deviantart.com/art/A… and a slightly recent one too rave-kunn.deviantart.com/art/B…"
yeah i feel very bad about not talking to you lately. actually this is a great reason for you to read the next journal that'll explain more about my absence from da and why i haven't been talking to people as much as before.
i was tagged by seilyn!! seilyn.deviantart.com/journal/…
1. Do you have a driving licence? (If you're too young, do you plan to take it?)
i do have one, i got it at 16 which is the minimum age where i live. but it took me a long time to feel comfortable with driving. i still don't always feel comfortable. but i have the CUTEST car. it's a red volkswagen beetle. of course i drive a beetle, it's so obvious. i love cute things and having a vw beetle was my destiny, lol. all my life i've wanted one.
2. What are your dreams?
idk if you meant "goals" or "imaginations you have when asleep" but i'll talk about both. my dreams that happen when i'm asleep are pretty awesome and weird. i don't dream every night, just once every several days. and i often have trouble remembering the dream.
i wish scientists would invent technology that creates a recording of your dreams, omg i need that in my life
one thing i've noticed about my dreams is that there is often a very complex and interesting building. i keep imagining the insides of all these strange and fascinating buildings, with all kinds of weird layouts and interesting things in the rooms. i wish there were some kind of meaning to the fact that i keep thinking about being inside these amazing buildings. maybe there is a meaning to it after all... who knows?
my biggest goal is to be a full-time manga creator. much to my parents' dismay, i decided not to be one of those "spare time" artists who has a regular job and does art on the side. i want the art to be the main job that i have this is a significantly large goal to reach but i think it'll be worth it in the end. i know art doesn't pay well, but whatever. another thing i would like to do to make money is invest in at least one business (earning a percentage of their profits). but yeah the main thing is the art. manga is my dream. i want to have a huge fanbase for my mangas and have people talking about them and i want fans to meet other fans and become friends. and i want them to do all the things that fandoms do, like fanart, doujinshis, cosplaying, writing, collaborating, and other fun fandom things. when i was more active in the makoharu fandom i thought 'this is the kind of fandom i want for my mangas.' that's why it's painful to not be a part of that... i really need to go back.
3. What kind of music do you like?
i like a lot of different types of music. favorites though are like... dance pop? idk how to descrive it. but it's just normal pop music but i like energetic ones with a dance beat. (and i love remixes of those.) and my other favorite is jazz. because... i don't even know how to describe why i like jazz. i just do. i especially like jazz that was made in the 1950's and 60's. but also a third genre of music i like is this 1950's music called "exotica." one day i want to draw an illustration based on this music. basically it's this old music that sounds like you're on vacation on a beautiful beach or something. it is SUPER relaxing. enjoy: www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2dQ3W…
4. Can you sing?
when i'm alone in the house or driving by myself, i love to sing. but never around people. too embarrassing!! (i'm an okay singer? kinda?)
there's no #5?
6. How many languages can you speak?
i don't speak any other language than english fluently but i took japanese classes while i was in college so i know a little bit of that. i wasn't the best person in the class and i've forgotten a lot by now but i do know some words here and there and can read hiragana and katakana.
7. What's your favourite book?
it's manga XDDD "la corda d'oro" is my fave.
8. And your favourite artist here on DA?
waaaaaay too many. just look in my favorites and you'll find some awesome artists!! ^__^ seriously, look in my faves. it's important to me that people look at what's in there because there's so much great stuff in there and i don't want you all to miss it.
9. Do you have animales?
i am not an animal person at all >__< no, i have never had pets and honestly i never will because i have no interest in them.
10. What's the most interesting thing you've done in your life?
my most interesting thing is that from jan-may 2015 i was in an internship at a theater (not a movie theater. a theater with a stage). that internship was SO cool. it was amazing to be in such a fancy theater and to be surrounded by people who did the behind-the-scenes office work on each spectacular show. i love the building too and idk i could go on and on but i really liked that internship, it was a cool place to be and i'm glad i had that experience.
the other most interesting thing is starting LaceSong
because it was a very serious effort of mine. it wasn't just a fun thing i did because i was bored. it was a serious effort to try to help myself and other manga creators. i wonder where it will go in the future? i have big plans.